Friday, October 19, 2007

in-and-out Belief

I just finished an excellent book entitled "Finding Your Plot in a Plotless World" by Daniel de Roulet. The title is self explanatory, but my best insight would be it is a "Purpose Driven Life" for people who realized the intentions were well, but the practicality is somewhat hard to grasp in such a violent, tipsy world.

I want to write about this book later, after it soaks in a lot more, but I mention it here just to set up where I am at in life. I understand fully that Christ is worth believing in, but at times I feel as though I am believing in something that I get warm and fuzzy with and that is it. I can be very sure that I am maturing in action as well, but it seems cloudy, as if I am cutting through fog before I can reach a better understanding of how to react to the situations I face in life. If it is a random conversation about music taste, to an actual personal encounter with someone in need, there is a right and wrong choice, supposedly, to make. My problem is I recognize that there are a numerous amount of choices, a most high choice and a terrible choice being the most exemplary.

But it is Christ that I keep coming back to. Belief in Him is something that eventually becomes a rude awakening. It is the reaction to the rude awakening that haunts me. I can't speak for most, but I just might, but it seems that I can say that He represents some good ideas and that He reaffirms my existence and that He is there if I need Him. This is all good points, but I understand that there must be more to it than this.

A brief dive into de Roulet's book clears up what I am verbalizing. He talks about what is the cure for the mundane, the fill in the blank moments in life. Why are they there if God is suppose to be this great presence that clears up all the slop and brings me to a new hope? Why then do I find myself writing activity logs at my job or pushing paper or waking up and falling into the same routine? Should not God supply a long lasting vacation from this mundane world once I accept Him? Well of course that's latter. So for those moments, the day to day, punching in process, "Office Space" like, I struggle with finding greater meaning in them. De Roulet's answer is less shocking than one would think, because it is God's, but I'll save that for another posting.

The point of this year-and-a-half-about-later posting is that Christ is ever so refreshing, as long as I allow Him to be. If I am hesitant and think that He is not in the mundane, then I am terribly mistaken. He is, I just need to look around me and not look at me. The belief issue is something of another matter, how strong I feel towards His warm presence compared to others is hard to tell, it's like crossing over into the do not judge territory. But, and this should be the last but, I know that if I feel that it is most proper to talk about Christ as much as possible, actively engaging in his plan so that I can even live it out and less talk it out, then that is how strong I have been pulled into Him.

I can't wait for other people to jump ship if I already know that I must in order to live.

1 comment:

Kaylyn Machelle said...

A year and a half later and this is what you have to show for it. Good stuff. I was just thinking the other day how this world is so "feeling" based, especially when it comes to love. It's a good thing that God doesn't love us when he feels like it, because I am sure he doesn't feel like loving me on a daily basis. Why? Because I am a sinner living in a fallen world. But he chooses to. Daily. God really is good, and it's refreshing to read the words of others who agree.